Jackass

So, I had this movie forever, and then one night I popped it in at like 1:00 am, just to watch a skit or two... next thing i know, it's 3:00 in the morning and I've watched the entire thing. It was pretty funny, I'm not gonna lie. Skits I liked? (aside from Ryan that is)

~Well the opening scene with the oversized shopping cart was a pretty cute idea to start the show I thought.
~The kid that was getting the electric shock on his pecks. Oh mann, his reaction just had me laughing!
~Johnny. Oh... just everything Johnny! How he entertains me, and how attractive he is.
~Oddly enough, I think it was the same kid in the electrode skit, but when the kid dressed up like a mouse and went through all the moustraps. That was soooo funny to me. Once again, his reaction was just classic.
~When Johnny fought Butterbean and just got rocked! Then when he was at the hospital about to get stitches. He was just out of it! He looks up and says, "I need help" so cute!
~Loved how nervous Johnny was when he was about to get shot by that bean bag. He was... sweating bullets... if you will. Then when they showed him 2 days later... they show him chest up, he points down and it's like, "What are you pointing at, and wanting to show us Johnny?!" I was a little disappointed when it was just his huge, painful looking bruise. I guess I thought he was gonna show me another huge something or other, but that's okay. He's pretty dang hot.

Now on to Ryan. Oh mann... everything he did was just cute! He makes me laugh so hard! His BMX Tug of War was really cute. On the special features, they had outtakes. He kept trying to do his intro line, "Hi, I'm Ryan Dunn. and i'm about to get yanked off this bike" He kept messing up, and finally goes, "F*** it! Let's just do this. AH! I'm so nervous right now!" Love when guys have that little bit of scaredness to them. So cute! But I love how after all his skits, he's always kinda mad about it. Right when he lands in the cacti. "That was a dumbass idea! I'm in Cacti!" (then you hear a distant voice say, "it's cactus") Ryan retaliates, "IT'S CACTI! Whatever it is, it hurts!" So funny!
The underwear bungee? Yeah, not gonna lie, pretty gross to me. However, Ryan laughing HYSTERICALLY? So cute! He was just ROLLING on the ground! In the commentary (yes, I watched the commentary too. Like you're surprised?) they were talking about how cold it was that day, and Raab had to be naked in the tree. Then Bam says how the East coast sucks because it's so cold and Ryan protests, "East Coast rocks man!" Cute... very cute!
There were a couple of other cute commentaries with Ryan talking to Bam. When Bam did the fireworks wake up, Ryan just went on and on about how much he loved Bam's outfit during that skit. He was wearing that weird fur hat, gold chains, and ace bandage around his chest-over the shirt. Ryan says, "That outfit? I could just watch that and that's the movie. Oh, I LOVED that outfit!" (kinda took me to an imaginary place of Ryan saying how much he would love one of my outfits. Maybe like some sweet ass pants, or something. And no matter how much he loved an outfit of mine, he always seemed to enjoy it more on the floor than on me.... Okay sorry... back to.... whatever)
Bam was talking about the blow up dolls during the rental car crash derby and wondered how any guy could get hard looking at one of those things and Ryan says, "Have you seen my ex-girlfriends? Were they attractive?"
Ryan saying how he still has a scar on his ball from when Johnny pegged him with a bowling ball... Thanks for the visual Ryan...
During the alligator skit in Bam's house, Bam says how he hates his mom's decorating and when she moved in his new house she decorated it all girly and stupid. Ryan totally stands up for her and says, "She made that house look good! She puts a lot of work into it. It looks all homey"

Ryan, you're adorable!

So when Ryan got his ass kicked by a girl? Oh mann, I was BUSTING up laughing! His expressions are so funny, and he just plays it up as much as he can. He looked TERRIFIED as she was warming up. So on the commentary, Ryan was talking about this girl and says, "Her legs are like tree trunks!" One of the guys asked Ryan what he thought of the girl and he says, "Beforehand I hated her, but afterwards I kinda liked her. (Then he gets hit in the face and goes down) She hit me right in the face and the nose made my eyes water." All the guys start laughing and teasing him for crying. Someone says, "No one's that big of a pussy." There is a pause for a couple of seconds and you hear Ryan say, "I am."
The off roading tatoo was amusing because Ryan was LOVING it. He just had a grin, ear to ear during that whole thing.

"I'm not too excited about this skit. It's not my favorite I've ever done cause there's a toy car up my butt." The butt Xray. Oh mann, so sick and wrong, yet entirely amusing! At first, he's being all funny as he's getting everything ready. Showing off his anal lube, and excited that his toy car happens to be his favorite color-blue. Then he gets all "anal" once he inserts the car. Dude, he was all raunchy. But, who likes anything up their butt right? He's all distrubed by it and says, "It feels so gross." I had to laugh when he was walking too. He would hang his head, and take these shorter steps, grabbing his butt cheek every once in a while.
That Cuban Doctor was soooo cute to me. I love when he's talking on the phone and they have the translation at the bottom, "...Yes they were at a party drinking and having sex with eachother..." Ryan had me laughing so hard too, "I would've rememered eating that... How did a car toy get there?" Ha ha! And when the doctor says that he needs to go to a physician to ge the car out, "Don't tell your girlfriend... boyfriend, or whoever. (points to Ryan's friend) He already knows and that's too many people" Then the doctor is talking about all the things he's seen in patient's rectums, and Ryan goes, "A bottle? Well that seems a lot worse than a car..." Oh mann... Ryan just kills me! That entire scene just had me laughing! Between the commentary, and behind the scene, they talked about that skit a little bit. I guess they went to a different dr. beforehand. It was a younger office and they just laughed at Ryan. Ryan was like, "Mann, imagine if that REALLY happened to me. I would have felt really bad!" So all the guys were teasing him about how he had the car in his butt longer than the audience knows, and saying he secretly liked it. Ryan's all, "I had to walk around with a car in my ass for hours!"
In the behind the scenes they interview him, and he says, "It wasn't necessarily a physical pain, it was more of a mental pain. I just needed a hug from a girl when I was done with that one." Then they cut to the hotel and Ryan his his shorts down, with a towl in his hand holding the car in. He's shuffling over to Bam in the corner saying "Dude, give me a hug. (Bam protests and tries to get away) I got a toy car in my ass, GIVE ME A HUG!" So Funny!

A few other things:
~I guess Ryan broke his arm when they filmed that shopping cart scene at the beginning. They show ryan walking out of all the rubble and he is PISSED! He's holding his arm and says so seriously, "I broke it once, and it's broke again." Ha ha.... ummm... then don't do that stuff Ryan... Oh mann, there's something so endearing about a guy getting hurt and being pissed. You just feel like laughing at them.
~Ryan explaining the alternate ending which essentially is one big device that has a trigger and will set something else off involving all the guys. (what are those things called again?) "So that 1,000 lb force behind it hits me... and i get hurt real bad..."
~I don't remember when he says this, but somewhere along the way says, "Why am I such a team player?"
~After the big golf cart wreck (and everyone was terrified that Johnny was seriously injured) Ryan was worried they didn't get enough footage- and Johnny would have got hurt for no reason- tries his hardest to convince Johnny that they need to keep filming and get more shots. Meanwhile Johnny is looking at him like he's the biggest idiot. Ryan was kinda out of it too... so I think that was Ryan's concussion talking, cuz he was not all there during his proposal to Johnny. But that whole golf cart scene was cute to me. I loved both of their outfits, and I loved how Ryan would get his face REALLY close to Johnny while he was driving.
~Oh yeah... another thing. On the behind the scenes they were saying how they couldn't believe everybody survived this movie, and they showed a whole bunch of clips of things that went terribly wrong. One clip shows Ryan with his head tilted back with about 4 medical people attending to him. His eyes were closed and they had some kind of cream/gel just LATHERED on his eyes. Bam asks if he's ok, and Ryan responds with this quivering voice (like he's trying soooo hard not to cry) "I don't know if i'm blind. I can't see anything right now" He just seemed so terrified, and it was the sweetest thing!

Anywho... Yes, I am crazy. But thanks for listening to all the things I find down right cute about Ryan! So amusing to me. Gotta love him! So now I need to go see the 2nd one... but I'm still nervous because I can't fastforward at the movie theatre... and I know steve-o does other stuff with his eyes in the 2nd one.... ::shutter:: So I'm not sure what to do... but I apologise in advance for another crazy posting about Ryan that will enevitablly come. So to sum up this HUGE posting in 2 words: Ryan's cute!